What happened? Why? How?

This morning I don't know what to say. I feel exactly like one does when someone they know dies. There is nothing to be done, you really just have to get on. There's not a lot of point discussing the whys, the hows, the who can we blame theories, none of it will change anything and its not like you will suddenly discover some magical switch that could help.

Now I'm sure some of you are thinking - get over it, its only rugby, (or worse) its only a game. If you are thinking that, then you will never understand.

My favourite book is Nick Hornby's Fever Pitch, while many think it is about football, to me it isnt. Its about being a fan. Hornby describes what it means to devote your entire being to the performance of 'your' team. The euphoria of the highs and yes the utter despair of the lows.

Needless to say - yesterday was the latter. It was like a car crash. One minute you're on a high, everything is going along fine, then all of a sudden - bam. When you set off, you know it would be disastrous if you cross the centre line - the risk levels are high. No matter how well you prepare, one lapse in concentration and whack youre gone. You can't undo it, you can't go back. There is no point thinking, if only I did this... or if I did that. That's what the latest world cup loss feels like. We knew - all to well - that it could happen, but its gutting all the same and thats it... the end. You're left shocked, dazed and not sure what to do next.

The worst bit though, is knowing full well, that in four years, you will again give everything to that team again. You will again think - this year is different, this is our year... even though the shadow of previous failures remain.

So that's it. I'm not interested in the media telling me what was wrong with the campaign, why Henry should be sacked etc, why 'they knew all along' that we would lose and so on. There's no point its done. See you in four years.